Setting boundaries is essential to your spiritual health, no matter your role or gender.  However, women are often the spiritual and emotional leaders of our families and communities.  In my personal and professional experience, we are often depleted and burnt out, teaching the next generations that to be a woman is to be unsupported and a martyr.  We are then only creating more anxiety, more uncertainty, and more unfulfillment.

We are the mothers of the world (whether we have our own children or not), and we need to show up fully nourished and fully expressed so that we can authentically care for the ones we love and serve. It’s time to stop passing down the brutal legacy of martyrdom, and pioneer a new way of living and leading as women.

Energetic, physical, and emotional boundaries are essential to this new way of leading and being in the world.  And these boundaries begin in conversation and role modeling, but also in our ancestry.  Let me explain with a personal story. 

Last month, I sat my daughters down, and with tears streaming down my face, I expressed deep sadness that perhaps I had taught them the wrong idea about motherhood. 

I told them that I had to take responsibility for my upbringing and lineage and make different choices in my mothering.  I felt distraught that I may have shown them a mother who was exhausted, felt unsupported, and overworked.  I needed them to learn from my own martyrdom and passive-aggressive anger that occasionally liked to burst out and throw things against the wall (not often, but have you tried it? It’s kind of exhilarating!). 

Being teenagers and somewhat afraid of me throwing things against the wall, they laughed and said they never noticed that.  

But what they aren’t aware of is the ancestral lineage of women that have made the agreements to stay stuck, stay quiet, and continue to say yes when they mean no.  It’s not their fault.  This is what women have learned throughout decades of quiet.  

But it is our choice and responsibility to learn how to have energetic boundaries in place to break the agreements and beliefs that keep us in disempowerment.  

You can transmute any negative energy, belief, or pattern into your healing and empowerment.

That is your gift.

When they say, “It runs in the family,”

You tell them, “And this is where it runs out.”

You have come here to heal your lineage. 

The patterns of disempowerment, martyrdom, and anything else that keeps you and your family small, is here for you to change.  

Women are the heart because that is the positive aspect of our wise and well ancestry that we have been taught.  Now it’s our turn to say no to what does not serve us.  The power is in our hands.